Wednesday, March 12, 2014

30 and 3 ..

Thirty years ago, I sat on a bench in a park 3 blocks from where I am right now... I walked away from everything I owned, and loved, on my own, clothes on my back and on foot. 

In all my writing over the years, I had forgotten about this little bit of information. In 1984, I disappeared for 3 years, no contact with anyone that I had known, or grown up with. No contact with family. I walked away. 

I moved down to Grays Harbor. Enrolled in community college, and worked at a mill, packing shims for .08 (peace work) the mill was 50 miles from where I lived. 100 miles round trip daily. I hitched rides with workers from the mill.

I stayed down there 3 years... loved the Ocean, but hated the small town setting. Even though I came from a relativity small town, I still hated it. I had hooked up with my daughters father and he was drinking and drugging like no tomorrow. I had not done anything pretty much since right out of high school. 

After my daughter was born, and after 2 years of college, major in Art, minor in history, then no degree, because I changed my mind, or my kids dad did, or who knows now.... point being, I was done with the area. 

I came back to the Everett area in 87, and started working at panama's, which later became Jimmy Z's. Krystal's dad and I split soon after. Anyway, so, in my blogs, writings, all this chaotic ramblings, I've talked about circles. Constantly. 

I had a friend say, maybe subliminal... on my part.. Then my daughter, being a smart ass like me, says, there is nothing soul searching or spiritual about this mom, you keep coming back, you never left for good. Ha! That is true, but then I wonder, had I, would circles be repeating themselves if I had only changed geography? 

3 years ago in April.... I met another person who has impacted my life greatly.. I'm not where I want to be now, and not sure where I am going..... what will happen, and un like 30 years ago, when everything was so much easier, than now, I have to make some decisions that I would rather not do. 

more soul searching.... 



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